The Ballad of John

Standing in the dock at Southampton
Trying to get to Holland or France
The man in the mac said
"You've got to go back"
You know, they didn't even give us a chance

Christ, you know it ain't easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They're going to crucify me

Finally made the plane into Paris
Honeymooning down by the Seine
Peter Brown called to say
You can make it okay
You can get married in Gibraltar near Spain

Christ, you know it ain't easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They're going to crucify me

Drove from Paris to the Amsterdam Hilton
Talking in our beds for a week
The news people said
"Say, what you doing in bed?"
I said, "We're only trying to get us some peace"

Christ, you know it ain't easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They're going to crucify me

Saving up your money for a rainy day
Giving all your clothes to charity
Last night the wife said
Oh boy, when you're dead
You don't take nothing with you but your soul
Think!

Made a lightning trip to Vienna
Eating chocolate cake in a bag
Newspapers said
"She's gone to his head
They look just like two gurus in drag"

Christ, you know it ain't easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They're going to crucify me

Caught the early plane back to London
Fifty acorns tied in a sack
The men from the press
Said, "We wish you success
It's good to have the both of you back"

Christ, you know it ain't easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They're going to crucify me
The way things are going
They're going to crucify me

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